When love meets conflict, how to resolve it skillfully?

“We always quarrel over trivial things, is this normal?” “Why can’t we always understand each other?” “After every argument, I don’t know how to mend the relationship.” Do these questions sound familiar? Conflicts and conflicts in love are inevitable, but the key lies in how we deal with and solve them, and this article will provide you with some practical advice from experts to help you be more calm when you encounter conflicts in love.

Identify the root cause of the conflict
We need to identify the root causes of conflicts, which are often not as simple as they seem, they may stem from deep-seated differences in values, differences in communication styles, and even the influence of personal growth backgrounds.

Advice: Engage in a deep conversation with your partner about what you disagree about and the reasons behind those disagreements, which requires patience and an open mind, but it’s the first step in solving problems.

Listen and understand
In a relationship, it is very important to listen to each other’s views and feelings, many times, conflicts arise because we do not really understand each other’s thoughts and feelings, and by listening, we can better understand each other, thereby reducing misunderstandings and conflicts.

Advice: When the other person is talking, give them an attentive listen, avoid interrupting, try to think from the other person’s point of view, and respect their feelings even if you disagree with them.

Nonviolent communication
Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is an empathetic-based communication style that emphasizes expressing one’s feelings and needs while also respecting the other person’s feelings and needs.

Suggestion: Use the “I” statement to express your feelings and needs, “I feel …… because I need ……”, and also ask the other person about their feelings and needs, “You feel…… Is it? You need to…… Is it? ”

Seek common ground
In the face of contradictions, finding common ground can help us reduce confrontation and increase the likelihood of cooperation, which can be common goals, values, or a common view on an issue.